What is the Leap of Faith?

In the Indiana Jones movie it was stepping off a cliff and just hoping there would be a path. A path he did not see. Why was he motivated? His father has been shot and there is limited time to recover the Holy Grail and bring it back to his father to drink so he can be healed. The Holy Grail will save the one he loves- his father.

We all have our Leap of Faith moments. I am acting on my guidance, the voice within. let’s see what happens. When in a moment where I take the “leap” I see get to see how fear holds me back. It is exciting to stare at it, see it for what it is and move right past it.

How ironic. I spoke with a good friend on the telephone as I was preparing to compete in the qualifying round of the Master’s Track Indoor National Championships in the 200m. A race, if Vegas was placing odds, I was the mule at the Kentucky Derby. I had those kind of odds from Vegas.

I experimented with my training in preparation for the meet. My training motto: “no pain in my joints while I train and the next morning when I get out of bed my foot will hit the ground and I can walk upright and fine.”

I decided that I would not be going to the track all that much once I developed some plantar fascitis in my left foot. Ways were provided for me to train. Ironically I ended up running more (curve treadmill and over speed treadmill) than I have in my past years. The Curve left me with no pain as I trained. I could train more often. I didn’t do any races because I didn’t want to do any races. I didn’t want to be a slave to the process like I have made myself in past years.

My theory was simple and I had to trust my inner voice. It was a Leap of Faith. “Don’t compete and don’t go to the track” and yet go compete at a Master’s National Championship track meet? Are you crazy?

My inner belief: I could run fast again if I could attain the memory within my body. I had to find my will and the technique of speed. I used to be fast and have not seen evidence of my speed of the past in some years.

What did I need to eliminate? The pain I was living in. Was I holding on to a past result, a past longing? Why would I willingly do this to myself? Why? Because I still want to win, to find the best “me” on the track. Yet the pain I was inflicting on my body was keeping me from finding the best me.

I finally, being fed up, went against logic. I said to myself “what is it I enjoy about Master’s Track?” I enjoy running. I enjoy the friends I get to see. I enjoy the “test” of the race itself. I enjoy the discipline it creates in my life. I enjoy the ups and downs of the process. I love overcoming the “down” part and finding the answer to how I will overcome.

In this training season I eliminated the “have to” of the process. I “have to” go to track meets. I “have to” compete. I “have to” go to the track and running “x” amount of volume at “x” amount of intensity “x” number of times a week. I thought if i can run pain free and run with a “want to” the best me will show up to the starting line.

I even dumped the stop watch with timing any interval runs in the 2 times I did go to the track. I went away from all logic that has built up in myself over the years of what I know track and field to be.

I went way outside the box.

How does my friend whom I called come into play with all this running? How did our discussion, which was non track related, have anything to do with track?

The conversation was about letting go of outcomes. Letting go of fears that have held me back. The conversation was about going for my goals. Now on this sheet of imperative goals winning the 200m at master’s nationals was not on the top list.

I made a decision to go for another goal I have been wanting for some time. The goal scares me only because in my mind I am not sure how it will get done. Isn’t it nice to know how something will get done before you start? I made my mind up I will go for it not knowing the outcome before I begin. Financial security is on the line. Some call this gambling wth your life. But isn’t a life worth living filled with chances? Don’t answer because my answer is “yes”.

It was freedom to know I will trust my inner voice and do as I am told to do. This allowed me to let go of doubt.

Now it was time to go race. I race not having a clue how my performance will be. I warm up and I think somewhere in my warm up that I am about to pass out due to lack of oxygen. We are racing at altitude. Here is the nut shell: I ran a time in qualifying that i have not run in 6 years. I qualify with the fastest time going into the finals. The next day I win the finals. I win the championship.

I just wonder if I set myself free because I am trusting my voice within? Some people like to call that voice God.

Is this race God’s way of telling me something about life? I would like to think so.